1. Not realizing that your woman is unique.
Now I am putting this one first because understanding this point is the key to understanding all of the other points. Guys always complain that women are too complicated and that it is impossible to understand them. I agree..It is impossible to understand women..BUT it is not impossible to understand YOUR woman. Despite what you may think, she is a unique individual. She does not have a type or category because there is no other woman like her in the world, which means that she will not respond to you like other women will nor should you respond to her like you would other women. She may have things in common with other women, but she is NOT those other women. Once you have gotten this into your head, you can now understand the other points
2. Not listening/not paying attention
Because your woman is a unique individual, this means that you do NOT already know everything about her...and because you don't know everything about her nor have you been in her head at any time in your life, that means she probably knows herself better than anyone else. Because she knows herself better than anyone else, she can tell you everything you need to know about her..but it requires listening on your part. Everything your woman says and does...from the way she wakes up and says good morning to the way she organizes her perfumes on the dresser to the way she gets upset when you raise your voice is a clue about who your woman is as a person. It is up to you to pay attention to these things and take note. On that same note, everything she says, she is saying for a reason...if you want to understand her, you need to listen. Now I am not saying pay attnetion to every single thing she says to every single person ( though it might help you a lot) but in those moments when she seeks you out for those talks ( whether they be after sex talks or just I am really upset talks) listening to her will help you understand what she needs and wants from you so much better, which means that she probably wont feel the need to complain about it. Now I recongize that at this point most men would say that its impossible to devote that much attention to someone and notice all the little things about them...to which I will respond that your woman does that for you every single moment of every single day of your relationship. She notices everything that you do and say which is why she is so good at figuring out what you want and need..or if something has changed between you/ if you're cheating ( hint: it's not woman's intutition..its that we pay attention more).
3. Saying things that you dont mean
Now this point ties into the previous one...women notice everything you say and do and more importantly, we remember what you say and do. So..if you say something that you have no intention of doing or dont actually mean and then later say or do something else that contradicts that 1st statement, we will notice. We may not say anything at that particular moment, but we noticed and we intend to bring it up. Now...something else you should realize about this point...whether or not you actually do or say the thing isn't the point, the point is trust. If I, as your woman, cannot trust what you say, then that opens a can of worms for a whole new set of problems. So...to save yourself trouble, don't say it if you dont mean it.
4. Expecting to receive something that you aren't Giving
Not much to say about this one other than...women are such creatures that we can give you whatever you want. If you were to ask for the world on a platter, we would give it to you..BUT if we give you the world, we expect the same in return. Now, this really isn't a man-woman thing so much as it is a common person thing. Nobody wants to be in a relationship where they are giving and giving and receiving little to nothing in return. That's not fun for anyone. Now when I say give it in return... I dont necessarily mean give EXACTLY what you are receiving in return because you know, people are different and some things cannot be so easily reciprocated, but give something that is equal in value. Now....this term "equal in value" brings up another point - to determine what equal in value is requires compromise. Now guys and girls, pay attn...because this is where it gets tricky..A compromise by definition means an agreement with which all parties are satisifed. Note the key words are all parties are satisfied. Now I am bringing this up because people (in general) too often believe that a compromise means "I give you just something/anything and I get what I want." That, my friends is not a compromise. Both of you must be getting something that you want in order for it to be a compromise...and just a hint. ( this is where the 2nd point comes in, ) if your woman is asking for something very specific whether it be more time with you or more sex withyou, etc, that's probably a good thing to reach a compromise about because that's what she wants!
5. Not clarifying what you mean...
This is pretty self explanatory lol but because the point is "to clarify what you mean" then I must do so. Words are such that their deifnitions have a connotation to them, and usually that connotation is personal. This means that when you use a word, your definition and understanding of it is base don your life experiences and may be completely different from someone else's definiton and understanding of it. Now usually this difference in meanings might only cause a mild misunderstanding, but when the word is important enough, it can cause a more serious rift. For example, take the phrase "I love you." To you, that phrase may just mean I have deep feelings for you and lets just see what happens" whereas to your woman, that phrase may mean that " we have deep feelings for each other and because we care for each other, we will always be honest with each other and try to make things work, no matter what." Now let's say for instance that she finds out you lied to her about somethng (which breaks point #3 but..), is it really that strange that she may accuse you of not really loving her? Another example, the word "relationship" to you may mean " We are monogamous and are solely seeing each other" whereas to her, it may mean " we are seeing each other but I can still go out with other men and do what I want" or vice versa. You just have to clarify what you mean, what you want, and what you need because women actually don't always know.
6. Presenting yourself as someone that you are not
K, last one...don't pretend to be someone you're not, plain and simple. Dont pretend to want a relationship if you only want sex or vice versa. Dont pretend to be this nice, sweet, Christian boy when in actuality, people typically confuse you with the spawn of Satan. Can't say how many times i have heard a guy describe himself as "laidback, chill, and respectful" and then snap off and start calling females every name in the book because she did not return your interest. If you can throw out a string of curse words disrespecting someone who has never so much as said or done anything to provoke it, yet you still think of yourself as respectful, you have issues. Dont present yourself as this sweet, gentleman type in the beginning and then 6 months later, you hitting her upside her head and choking her. Be honest about who the hell you are as a person so you can steer clear of each other if it is determined that you are not a good match. Saves a lot of heartache and wasted time in the longrun. Also, as a side note...if you lie about who you are/what you are in the beginning of the relationship, you are going to have to spend the whole relationship covering up that lie, which only hurts you more because when she finds out you lied....Lord help you..so really just be honest. It's not hard.
